“Am I Enough?”

This week my husband walks in the door after a long day at work to find: dishes piled in the sink, laundry all over the living room, the beef for dinner still in a frozen block, and me…looking like Frump Queen. He is gracious. And tells me to take a nap. I instantly obey. (Inwardly rejoicing.) And while I am sleeping for 45 minutes, he manages to clean the whole house…while watching our daughter. (A feat I clearly was incapable of accomplishing today. Many days.)

One part of my feels grateful the house is clean. I can relax now, right? But the other (bigger) part of me feels guilty and defeated. He just worked the whole day at his job, and then came home and did mine, too. Isn’t this why I am staying home? 

Every day I have this desire to accomplish something. But every day it feels I accomplish nothing. I try to clean something, but I don’t finish. I want to do a house project, make my space more beautiful, but all those gorgeous pics on Pinterest look like something from another world. Not mine. I leave to buy something, but roam aimlessly around in the store. Nothing to bring home. I try to write, but this little person cries for all of my attention when I sit at the computer. I clip coupons and price match, and still go way over on our budget. Agh. At the end of the day, there’s nothing to show for the last 9 hours of exhausting effort. Of doing what? 

When it feels I didn’t accomplish Super Tidy Housewife, or Spiritual Sage, or Fun Mommy, or Adoring Wife, or Betty Crocker, or the Likeable Friend…when I’m none of those titles, and all the opposites..

I have to wonder: “Am I enough?

I lay my head on the kitchen table, cheek against wood, and cry. I want my days to be of worth. But feel like they are all so: Unsuccessful.

As I lay, frozen, I hear a whisper, my daughter’s whisper:

Dear Momma,

Do you remember the nights you cried on the bathroom floor in the dark? When the pregnancy tests sat negative in the trash can? Remember when my nursery was just a storage room? A place for you and Daddy to throw your junk? Remember how you longed to brush my hair with your fingers, to sing me lullabies, to hold me close? And now I’m here. 

Am I enough?

When there’s dishes in the sink, and your skinny jeans sag from all the bending, and dinner’s ingredients still sit on the shelves of the supermarket, because your days are full, full of me. Am I worth your attention? Am I an accomplishment?

Am I enough?

You kept me safe today Momma, you kept me alive. You kept me fed, and rested. You played with me, and made me laugh. Does that count Momma? Am I one of your goals Momma? Just to be together? Even if no one sees it? Or knows it?

Am I enough?

Tell me Momma, did you think I’d be different? Did you hope I’d be different? Do you see me? I’m right here Momma, the answer to your sobbing prayers. But now that I’m here, is there something else you want Momma, to feel good? Do I make your day count Momma?

Am I enough?

And suddenly, the voice changes. My heart wrenches. The Spirit of God begins to whisper, making the table under my wet cheek feel more like the chest of God. And suddenly I know He’s near.

Do you remember when I said, “Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for Me?” (Matt. 25:40) “And if anyone gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones who is my disciple, truly I tell you, that person will certainly not lose their reward?” (Matt. 10:42) Do you not see it here Child? 

All these days you live at home to serve this fragile girl, what you really are doing is serving Me. For whatever you do unto her, you do unto Me. So let me ask you:

Am I enough?

What is My worth to you? In the secret places, where no one sees? Look deeper Dear One.

Can you find Me in this place? In her face?

Every diaper, every clean, dry pair of clothes,

cups of water, Cheerios, all the laughter, every tear,

each soothing whisper in her ear.

In doing so, you so clothe Me, feed Me, hear My cry,

soothe Me with your lullaby.

If all you do is spend your days, your self, on Me..

Am I enough?

271 thoughts on ““Am I Enough?”

  1. This is beautiful <3 I had to fight back the tears. Thank you for sharing this part of your story. I know this feeling all too well… I've just quit my full time job, in part because I wanted to spend more time with my son. Now I go through days wondering why I haven't accomplished anything but the reality is… he, I and God… are all enough.

    • Wow, that is awesome! I can certainly relate. I’m sure that was a hard big step; may God bless you with joy as you spend time with your little guy! 🙂

  2. Thank you for sharing this. I understand this and can completely relate. I am so appreciative that other mothers share there story so that we can all connect together, rise together, and pick each other up through each others beautiful words; especially on days when we ask “Am I enough?” Wonderful.

  3. Goodness I wasn’t ready for this overflow of tears but I thank you. Thank you for giving me what I needed just when I needed it. Thank you for putting things into the right perspective. And lastly, thank you for sharing. Be blessed.

  4. Reblogged this on Squeaky Lemur Mama and commented:
    If you haven’t seen this yet, it’s well worth a read!
    This spoke so deeply to me – for the days when all i’ve done is soothe a crying baby, and the dishes didn’t get done, the laundry is all still dirty (and I’m not allowed to run the dryer after 7 pm. *sigh*), and my husband comes home and cleans… What a perspective change this brought me! How can I say that serving the Lord is not enough?
    Society has impressed upon me the need to be perfect, and to “get done” “enough”.. whatever that may be. But i’ve begun to realize that if I really wanted to succeed by those standards, I would have to pay less attention to my son – sure i’d be “successful,” but at what? Not at raising my son, which is the one reason i’m staying at home and not putting him in daycare!
    Would I like my business to be more fruitful? Yes! Would I like to be a stellar housekeeper that doesn’t have dusty shelves and a dirty bathroom? Yes!!!!
    But I would rather have a happy, well loved son who knows how much I love him, and how much God loves him. A clean bathroom isn’t worth more than the giggles of my son. Folded laundry isn’t worth more than watching him balance and try to walk, then comforting him as he falls flat on his face, praising him for his efforts, and assuring him one day it’ll happen.
    How can I say this isn’t an accomplishment?

  5. Can we be friends? No, I mean like really. I can’t tell you how much this spoke to me today. I spent seven years crying alone on the bathroom floor in the dark for children. I lost a baby. I gave up on IVF. The doctors said I’d never have a natural child. I went through the hell of foster care. And in the middle of that hell I somehow became pregnant and now I have an adopted 2 year old boy and a 1 year old daughter. And all of those lessons about worth I thought I’d learned through all of that hell…about being a woman and being worthy despite not having kids….have now all somehow transferred to how NOT good of a mother I am and how I’m NOT quite as successful (okay, nowhere near as successful) as I want to be in my writing career. I cried reading this, because your words are my inner thought life on a daily basis. Thank you for this letter from my “children”…your words are their words. I need to let some of this worth junk go. I need God to help me do it somehow. He gave me these blessings and while life is messy and overwhelming…man, I have a lot to be thankful for.

    • Yes.:) Wow. I am amazed at what God has brought you through, and how He has blessed you with these two little people in such a unique way! I am so glad you can relate and may God continue to open your eyes to what He calls “success.” Success can’t always be measured with our eyes. There’s not always something to show for all your time and effort. But God sees. He sees it all, and He sees your heart dear sister. May He open your eyes to see Him in all your daily life. Us moms put so many expectations on ourselves. But may God set you free to only live the callings He has called you to! Thanks for your kind words.
      Blessings,
      Rebekah

  6. After 10years of being unable to have children we had 4 babies in four years (through a combination of adoptions & unexpected pregnancies). There are many frustrating days, seemingly unproductive, where I completely relate to the first part of your blog…I found such comfort in your words, thank you.

  7. Caring for children is the most important job a woman can have. The devil tries to make us feel different – inadequate, unfulfilled. Hug them, love them, cherish them. the dishes can wait. and bless your husband. blessings, Amy

  8. I love this! THank you! “Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling…It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for. (Ensign Nov. 2011, 28)” This was shared with me just two days ago! I know I am on the right path when in within a couple days even just three woman are thinking along the same line! I know God is in my life! And, what an amazing calling!-not easy, but wonderful. A love that only a mother knows! Thank you again, for sharing!

    • I really, really, really appreciate your comment. That quote is perfect. You are absolutely right! I think the Lord is trying to tell us something we all have the tendency to miss. He places value on things sooo differently than our culture does! You are welcome, and thank you for your encouragement!
      Rebekah:)

  9. Dear Rebekah,

    This post spoke to the very center of what I’ve been struggling with and and answered the very core of why I’ve been feeling the same things you shared in the beginning of your article.

    This spoke so much to me that I would like to use excerpts of your article for our MOPS video (I am our Publicity rep for our MOPS [mothers of preschooler] group in Manchester, TN) with your permission. Please feel free to continue responses with me via my email.

    Thank you so much!

    Sincerely,
    Stephanie Reynolds

    • Hi Stephanie,
      For some reason I wasn’t able to send email to the email address you left. But of course you can use excerpts of “Am I Enough?” for your MOPS video. I am a new member of MOPS myself! If you could give credit, with a link to my blog, that would be appreciated. (Also, I would love to see the finished product, if possible!) Not sure if there is a way to do that, but if so, let me know when it’s finished. 🙂 I am thrilled God is using this to show women where He places value. Thank you for getting in touch with me! If you have another email address, let me know, and we can communicate that way.
      Blessings,
      Rebekah

      • Hi Rebekah!

        Thanks for responding! I’m so sorry that the email didn’t work for you! You can always reach me at [email protected] or [email protected]. I would LOVE to share the finished project with you and would DEFINITELY give you credit in this video! I really appreciate you allowing us to use your post to help us reach other moms through the MOPS program.

        I know your words will touch many others through this!!!

        If you’d like, I’d be happy to send you what I have scripted from your post for you to review before we film on Wednesday, July 9.

        Thank you again for sharing your words and ideas with us…I know it will help make this project a powerful and impactful one!

        Sincerely,
        Stephanie Reynolds

      • Stephanie,
        Thank you! I am so excited to see how the video turns out! And I would love to see the finished product! I will get in touch with you through your other email address, and see if we can continue communication that way!
        Blessings!
        Rebekah

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  11. Well, now I’m just a weepy mess. This is incredible. Thank you for this. I was infertile for three years, and now am so incredibly blessed with three beautiful babies, but I find myself feeling this exact thing. So, thank you for the scripture and the beautiful reminder.

    • You are so very welcome! I am glad you can understand the core of this message! May God empower you daily to enjoy those three beautiful blessings. 🙂
      Rebekah

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  13. Rebekah…I am blessed with four children and lost two so even though I can understand the pain of loss, I could never imagine the pain of not being able to conceive. Someone shared your post on Facebook and I cried through the whole thing. It was very moving. My youngest is 10 and how often do I pass her over to *accomplish* something! This is a powerful reminder. I shared with everyone. Thank you!

    • Oh, I am so glad! Even though I’ve written this, it is still a continual perspective I need to remember. It is so easy to forget and just keep trying to “accomplish” more to feel better about myself. I am glad you were touched by it!

  14. I don’t comment on blogs and I rarely am moved to tears but this is amazing. I have one infant so I am new to this whole lifestyle and thought that I felt this way because i was making beginners mistakes. It is wonderful to know that’s not true, that I haven’t been the failure Ive felt like. My family thinks a full time mom is simply not having a job. I get a lot of hurtful passive-aggressive comments about it. I’ve noticed that women who who “want/ed” to be full time moms but don’t (in my experience, these are families who when they say they can’t afford for the wife to stay home mean that they can’t maintain their exact same lifestyle if the wife stays home, but could afford it if they were willing to make major adjustments) think that it’s the ultimate weekend. That’s the general attitude around me. Combining that with how imperfect my home is has left me feeling like I’m disappointing everyone. But I am not disappointing my little baby and certainly not my Heavenly Father. I was having a particularly low day and a particularly sinful, self pitying day. Thank you for writing this and calling my heart to attention in such a gentle way.

  15. Thank you for writing this. Truly, God led me to read this in the wee hours of the morning that I am up, unhappy about not being ‘enough’ as I sit here in our living room with laundry baskets of clean clothes I have not had a chance to fold and baby dolls and trains all around after a day with my kids. I have to work full-time as a teacher at this point in my life. I regret every hour during the school day I have to spend away from my own kids, so when the summer comes, I try my hardest to make up for it by taking my kids to parks, painting with them, play dough, etc.. My kids are little (3 1/2 and 2 1/2, one year and one week apart!) and I love them with all my heart. We lost our first son at 35 weeks, who was actually a twin (we lost his sibling early on in the pregnancy). Our son would have been 5 this November. God was gracious and helped me work through the fear of trying to get pregnant again after our losses and was with me every step of the way through each the subsequent pregnancies, through all the fear, tears, anxiousness, and joy as our two blessings entered the world healthy. Oh the joy of hearing their first scream as they entered the world after the agony of the deafening silence of our stillborn son being born such a short time before. I think of all this and am grateful for my kids all the time, but, I very easily get caught up in “I am not good enough…I am a horrible housekeeper…I am not a good Mom or wife…I can’t keep up”. Thank you for posting this as a reminder of what is important….and it is NOT the laundry or the dishes that pile up!

    • I am so moved by your response, it has brought tears to my eyes. I am so thankful God has blessed you with these two little ones. And I am so glad God spoke to you through this message. What you do is truly important and valuable. Thank you for your heartfelt response. May God empower you to enjoy your little ones, whether it’s a busy schedule, or a very loose one.:)

  16. Wow. I did NOT and COULD not hold back the tears. I am a stay at home mom of a 3 year old and 10 month old and this hit me hard. I have these days all the time and my husband has come home, after working 14+ hours and done the same thing for me. Ran me a bubble bath, handed me a glass of wine and cleaned and cooked. Its hard to feel defeated, like you failed your only job…but everyone needs a break sometimes. Thank you for this. It was much needed. <3 Everyone needs to cry sometimes too. 🙂

    • I know this is an old post so I apologize, my children are currently 3 and ten months(soon to be eleven!) And this is my life. My house is full of toys. The dishes and bottles aren’t clean. The laundry is clean, but in baskets unfolded. My house is a mess. And i wonder “what have i even DONE all day??!!” My husband comes home and I feel as though I ask so much of him after working hard all day, in the sun and the heat, to provide for us and make it possible for me to stay home. But he comes home and takes care of our children, without me even having to ask, and asks me if I want anything or need anything. He cooks, can’t say he cleans much 😉 lol, and I look around and I feel like I have failed. I’m not a good mother, a good wife, or a good house keeper (which I told him I would be if he were to get a better job, which he DID, so I could quit mine and stay home with our first) and he comes home to a mess. But he loves me. My children love me. And we are HAPPY. I pray for patience and guidance and energy for each day and some days I accomplish everything I set out to do. Some days my children are changed and fed and alive, and that’s all that matters to me. And this post, that I look back on frequently, gives me the courage and motivation to keep going. I am doing what I was meant to do-be a mother. And in doing so, I am serving an almighty God. And I know you are way ahead of me at this point, I want you to know that even now you are doing the same. We all think we are doing nothing when in reality we are doing EVERYTHING. Prayers to you and may God bless you. 🙂

      • Marrisa,
        Oh thank you for your honesty! 🙂 I can completely relate to you in the struggle. I do believe that some women are truly more gifted in this area than others–I am not. But I am trying my best, and learning to improve where I can. Please don’t think I am ahead of you in any way! I am learning..just like every single other mom. But it is true, when we minister to our children–we are ministering to Christ himself. And that is a precious thing. It is an honor to be able to care for our children, and our husbands, and sometimes it is seen, and sometimes it is in secret. But the Lord sees it all. So whatever you do today, let it be done to Him. Knowing that it is the Almighty God you serve. And He is, and always will be enough. Even when we don’t feel like we are. 🙂

  17. My wife and I read this together last night and loved it. We have four kiddos all age five and under, so we’ve got that glorious insanity going on in our house. My wife related to a lot of what you said and shared it with her mama friends. As a husband who comes home to a sometimes-disheveled house (like your husband as you mentioned in the post), let me say that we get it, even though we don’t get it. We will never know what it’s like to be home in the more-often-than-not chaos all day long, but we do appreciate what you mothers do and more importantly who you are. I can’t speak for all husbands, but I know my bride is rock star superhero even when she’s still in her jammies stepping over the unfinished laundry on her way to the kitchen to make boxed mac ‘n’ cheese for supper because it’s just been one of those days. But I know she’s poured her heart into everything she’s done that day and she’s been protecting the treasure chest–our most valuable asset: our children. She doesn’t realize it most days, but she’s investing daily, pointing them to God, cleaning off the coins and making them shine. I’d have mac ‘n’ cheese every night for the rest of my life for that.

    • This made me cry! It is so incredible hear your perspective, and to walk this journey with others that see the value in it. Thank you so much for your thoughtful and sincere response. My husband and I both appreciate your words. May God bless you and your family, (mac n’ cheese and all.) 🙂

  18. Reblogged this on writingwithintrees and commented:
    Good morning, sister. Need a pick me up? She speaks to my heart this morning.
    “Every day I have this desire to accomplish something. But every day it feels I accomplish nothing…
    When it feels I didn’t accomplish Super Tidy Housewife, or Spiritual Sage, or Fun Mommy, or Adoring Wife, or Betty Crocker, or the Likeable Friend…when I’m none of those titles, and all the opposites…”

    THIS.

  19. There may be other comments here from men (as I haven’t had the time to read them all), but if there aren’t, I just want to take a moment and offer a thank you from the inferior sex. My wife shared this with me and it deeply touched us both. In the 8+ years of our marriage the feelings you expressed have been a topic of much conversation in our household and it always breaks my heart to hear that my wife feels like her life is slipping away due to her choice to “just” stay home with the kids and raise them. It hurts even more that I can’t seem to communicate to her just how much I appreciate her choice, and how important I know her work is. In this piece you a) helped me better understand her frustrations and b) helped her understand how meaningful her choice to stay home is. What a blessing to us both!

    Thanks for sharing, and God bless you in your journey…

    • Thank you so much for letting me know how this touched both of you. I know it’s hard for my husband and I to always fully understand each other, because we are in two totally different worlds each day until he gets home. I’m glad I helped you see a little deeper into the picture, and I’m also thrilled your wife can see her immense value as well! Sounds like you guys are a great team. 🙂 May God bless you guys and your family.!

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  22. Thank you so much for writing this post! I’m sad to say this is the very first time I’ve thought about serving my son as if I’m serving Christ. I was instantly confronted with my own issue of discontentment–if I could just get to finish my master’s degree, I’d be happy. If I could just have a part-time job doing something…anything…I’d be happy. If I wasn’t at home all day, every day. But He has entrusted me with my son, for THIS time in THIS season. Thank you, thank you, for writing out exactly how I’m feeling. 🙂

    • Oh, I’m so glad you could gain this perspective! It kind of changes everything, doesn’t it? I’m learning more and more our world often puts ZERO value on the things God deeply values. We may not always get public approval, but God sees. And that makes all the difference. Blessings to you:)

  23. I have never been to your blog before but found you through Carrots for Michemas and boy was that the Holy Spirit. I was just crying an hour ago about how I have nothing to show for my 32 years. I am pregnant with baby number 5 and feel sometimes like nobody cares that I stay home. My kids are all little and I feel so alone in my journey, I don’t know many other moms here (we just moved) and I wonder sometimes if my kids will even care that I stayed home with them. Thank you for you words that made me sob, but they were very, very healing.

    • Sarah,
      I’m so glad God spoke to you through this, lifted your chin and showed you the worth He sees. I am the middle of 5 children. My mom stayed home with us all–and we loved the time we had with her. How constant she was for us. You are truly doing something incredible, even if you can’t see the growth in a tangible way. Much love to you!
      Rebekah:)

  24. Thank you so much for writing these words. I’m a mom of a 2.5 year old and an 8-week-old, and I find myself CONSTANTLY wondering if I’m enough, as a mom and a wife. And a friend, and a daughter. Your words not only resonated and let me say, “me too!”, but they also gave me hope. And a reminder of purpose. Thank you.

  25. Hi Rebekah, This is a lovely post. You have managed to really, really make me meditate on how important “He” is and not myself. Oh, that we would do this more often. I thank my daughter Candi for sharing this post and praise God for you. For your gift with words and that you have the courage to share them with others. Blessings!

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  27. I’ve read this a lot in the last week and cried each time. Thank you for such sweet encouragement! I am a very new mom and needed to read this so badly. It is wonderful to know that I’m not alone and to be reminded that even changing diapers all day is a beautiful things in the eyes of God. I wrote on my blog last week about how encouraging this was to me. Thanks again!

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  29. I just wrote this post on FB ( copied and pasted underneath) then someone shared this blog post with me and I sobbed. Hard. Ugly. Gulping sobs! It took me four years to become pregnant with my oldest Son and he is such a difficult little spirit. Sometimes I forget how much I prayed for him to come to me. You out right answered my prayers today.

    “I’m usually too logical to beat myself up. The human mother is only capable of so much, plus it is a major pet peeve of mine to hear an amazing, strong lady berate herself but today…..it came. Like a flood I felt it pounding and crashing into me, blind siding me. How could I be so behind? How is it possible to have sooo much on my plate I’m not achieving?

    Just the day to day stuff is like a giant mountain, bills, finding a job, how can I find a job when there is so much to do around here? Just the things my oldest has to learn how to do, ride a bike, swim, read, write, memorize site words (yes, during the summer) and that’s what needs to be done in one day. I spend so much time talking Parker off a proverbial cliff it’s difficult to get to everything else he needs to do. And what about my other children, or my self? Reading scriptures, prayers, exercising, eating right and that’s just the basics. Thank goodness I have a husband who is so helpful with the household stuff or I would really be in trouble.

    When we have gone through really hard times I have had people say, “Well at least you don’t have to go through what the pioneers did”. Well I beg to differ. This world is a hard busy, busy world with so many expectations. Sometimes it can just swallow you whole.

    I think it’s time for me to go listen to Elder Holland’s talk “Because She is a Mother” and cry like a baby…….”

    • Thank you for your thoughtful response! I agree that being a mom is tough work, and in a society that is constantly screaming that we achieve more, be more, put out more…it can leave a woman quite defeated. So thankful God places value on the things no one else will ever see, and always gives us enough strength to do what He is calling us to do. (Even if it seems like a very small thing!) Blessings to you. 🙂

  30. Rebekah (that’s my daughter’s name too, even spelled the same, after Rebekah in the bible) ~ what a beautiful post! I am mom of 5 children & 1 adorable grandchild, so most of my children are older ( ages 23, 21, 19, 17, & 16), but I can tell you that I felt that way when they were young, & I sometimes still feel that way, now that they are older. Because I guess teenagers need their mom, too, just in different ways. As babies, they needed me to stay up through the night when sick to their tummies, now as teens, they need me to stay up through the night with them when they are sick to their hearts ~ as toddlers, they needed me to give them a hug & talk them through the activities of the day, now as teens they still need a hug & a talk, but on a far more comprehensive level. As small children, they needed me to help them learn how to clean & cook & take care of things, now as teens, they need me to remind them to clean & cook & take care of things. They used to need to tell me about their days, and they still do, they used to need me to be their excuse to not be in a situation they felt uncomfortable with (“I can’t do that, my mom said I can’t”… even though I had no clue about it ~ I always told them “you can always blame it on me ~ just say I said you can’t”) , they still do use me as an excuse, only now they say “Ah, I don’t think my mom would be very proud of me if I did that.” They used to ask me to kiss their booboo’s all better, or their dolls’ booboo’s, now my kids ask me medical advice questions. (“Mom, what should I use for this zit?) They used to give me their dolls to hold for them while they ran & did something, now my daughter calls up & asks me if I would maybe like to babysit for a few hours, so she & her husband can get away on a much needed date. My son used to let me rub his head to take away a headache, now he asks me for help on a prom-night hair-do.
    There is no end to being a mother, or to those feelings of inadequacy, but I can promise you that if you spend the time now, putting in those precious hours, you will never regret it in the long run. Your house may not be the spiffiest on the block, & you may not look like the latest cool actress, but your children will love you & cherish you, and that, my friend, is worth every tear, every awful sink of dishes, every last-minute soup & sandwiches dinner, & every hour of lost sleep. You can never replay their childhood. Make it worth every moment that God blessed you with them.

  31. I cry every time I read this!!! Thank you so very much for sharing this beautiful post with the world.
    I also cried on the bathroom floor after negative pregnancy tests and two miscarriages. And my daughter’s nursery was formerly our storage room as well. Your words cut straight to my heart.

    Thank you for reminding me about what truly matters each day. <3

    • Rebekah,
      (We share the same name:) Thank you for your kind response. I am so very sorry to hear about your miscarriages, that is heartbreaking. I am glad you could find comfort in my words, and the things the Lord revealed to me about how precious our roles are as mothers, and the honor that it is to serve our babies, and Christ. May you enjoy ever moment of your mothering. 🙂
      Rebekah

      • Certainly! My wife went through 4 miscarriages, so I saw many of those emotions from her – and it’s made her the mother she is today! She really enjoyed your post as well. She shared it too – that’s where I saw it.

    • Dani,
      Thank you so much. And you are certainly welcome. This one came right off the pages of my journal, so it was raw. And it was real. And it was vulnerable to share. But I felt the Lord wanted me to share it, and it happened to be that so many others resonated with the message. The value of serving a child, and most importantly serving Christ is enough. Oh, so much more than enough. So thankful to get to walk this out.
      Blessings,
      Rebekah

  32. Am I enough?…shared on facebook, a real blessing to read. Thank you Rebekah. God is with all who let Him into their lives. ..and in every stage of life. I too prayed for a person to come into my home..my prayers were answered! I too found myself caught up with more demands of my time and attention. The person I prayed for, being more high maintenance than I figured on. Your writing helped me to see my situation in better perspective and to recognize again that it is not “I” alone in this journey.
    The person I prayed to have in our home is my 95 year old mother.

    • Alberta,
      I was so touched by your comment. I think that taking care of an aging parent is such a precious thing in God’s eyes. Surely, as you minister to her, you minister to Christ also. What you are doing is of such great worth! Thank you so much for sharing your perspective. That is amazing.

  33. Oh this post hit my heart in such a deep way. I can so relate and your words have brought healing to my tired soul tonight. I am so encouraged. I am blessed by your writing. Thank You.

    • Lisa,
      I am so glad that you were encouraged by this post! That is the very reason I write at all. This was one of my most vulnerable posts, and yet, it’s the one that seems to touch the most hearts. So many of us moms feel this way, and so many don’t realize the important privilege or value we have in ministering to our children, and to Christ. Thank you for reading. May God bless you and your kids. 🙂

    • Lisa,
      I am so glad that you were encouraged by this post! That is the very reason I write at all. This was one of my most vulnerable posts, and yet, it’s the one that seems to touch the most hearts. So many of us moms feel this way, and so many don’t realize the important privilege or value we have in ministering to our children, and to Christ. Thank you for reading. May God bless you. 🙂

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  35. I found this several months ago somewhere on Facebook, but I return to it often when days get rough. When I find myself feeling like less than I could be. And you remind me of what is real and true. My daughter is such a blessing and a gift to me, and she is more than enough. My husband works hard throughout the day, but so do I. But I have the privilege of being paid in giggles and hugs, with the tip of the occasional snuggle. Thank you for your words, they mean a lot to me. And they make me cry, but in a good way. 🙂

    • Lindsay,
      Thank you for your beautiful words of response to this. I love how you said you get paid in giggles and hugs and snuggles.:) How true! I too often struggle with the feelings of not accomplishing things, or at least as much as I wanted to. It is tough because we live in a culture that tells us daily (directly or indirectly) we need to be producing, and doing, and accomplishing more. But in my life, that’s just not the reality. Everything takes me a long time. But the most important things (and often the ones no one will see or congratulate me for) God always gives me the strength and ability to do. I think I will do some more writing on this topic soon, just because I am still struggling with it. And need to keep remembering what is really important. Thank you so much for your encouragement, and may God continue to reveal to us in more and more ways what is and Who is, “enough.”
      Rebekah:)

  36. TEARS!! Thank you for this post. I really needed to read this right now….
    I work part time from home and I feel like I never get anything done. My husband points it out way to often too! He told me this weekend that he’s going to put in more hours at work and hire a cleaning lady. I told him to afford that I might as well quit my part time home office job so I could have more time to clean. And all he said was “but would actually clean?”. My “uselessness” is tearing me up inside. I’m tempted to go back to work full time and put the kids in daycare. At least bringing home a paycheck would be proof of some accomplishment. I love being able to be with my daughters though. I don’t want to miss out on anything!

    • Danielle,
      You are certainly in a tough spot. I believe being with your kids is an accomplishment in and of itself. No one will be clapping for you as you change diapers, and scrub the toilet, but God sees the things you do, and you are valuable in His eyes. So don’t underestimate your worth, even if no one else sees it. At the same time, I know we are called to honor our husbands and take care of what God has entrusted to us, so I pray that He will show you how to do just that. Some husbands are really blessed by a clean house, and others, not as much. But if your husband loves a clean house, perhaps the Lord will show you a way to do it (even if it means dinner is super easy!) 😉 I’m no pro at cleaning tips or time management…so I can’t offer you those. But what I can say, is cry out to God about this, right now, wherever you. Because He is close, and He cares deeply about you, and your husband, and family. And I believe He will answer you, in perfect wisdom and show you the way. Much love to you.
      Rebekah:)

      • Oh my…someone IS like me! I googled “feeling inadequate as housewife and mother” and this popped up. As a mother of four ranging from 12 to 2-two of them high functioning autistic-I find it so hard to feel as if I’m accomplishing anything. I am supposed to be writing a book, been supposed to be writing a book for as long as I can remember, but between juggling IEP meetings,coaxing independence out of my special needs kiddos, potty-training the sweet but stubborn toddler, helping with homework that is slowly creeping beyond my expertise(ok. Sometimes rapidly racing), trying to encourage my wonderful husband in a fledgling business, and maintaining a minimum level of cleanliness, I find my head collapsing on my laptop more days than not-if I even get to open it, that is. And, as has been the go-to stance of this very insecure gal, I begin to wonder if I am enough. Will I ever be enough? And, when, try as I might to manage every problem, prevent every hurt, smooth over everyone else’s doubts about themselves, something spins out of my hands and fails, I am excellent at berating myself, slow to give myself the mercy I extend to others, swift to take the blame for not being “good enough”. Grace has always been great for all those other Christians, but not for me. Needless to say, I am the poster child for guilt. Your words are welcome reminders to embrace His grace,to celebrate the beautiful gift of motherhood for all it is, even when it looks the least beautiful to us or even to the world. Because, even when we can’t see through our tears, He can. His vision is never cloudy. He looks down on His own like we look at ours. Even when they are filthy, smelly, raggedy, snot-nosed, hollering,rebellious or ,ornery, we look on our kiddos with love. And so does He. Thank the Lord! And thank you for your candid and timely words! I surely needed them today! God bless!

  37. Pingback: I Am Enough. You Are Enough. | the love that carries me

  38. I just found your blog tonight. Such a blessing! I cried as I read this as a stay at home mommy to triplet three year old daughters and a five week old son. My days are so full- of the running, the working, the constant chores that never do actually end, and the sound of four little voices calling for more of me, the press of four little bodies against me begging for one more game, one more story, one more hour of my undivided attention and care. And I’ve so often wondered, when I look around at night and see the messy house that I cleaned four times that day, the filled dishwasher I already filled and ran once that day, the growing piles of dirty laundry when I just finished all the laundry that morning, whether what I’m doing is enough…Whether I’m enough. You are right: I am enough, they are enough…because He is enough. Why is this so easy to forget? What more could we hope to accomplish than raising the eternal souls He’s entrusted to us?
    Thank you for writing, for sharing truth that reaches deep down to change the hearer.

    • Katie,
      I am so touched by your comment. Thank you for sharing just a slice of your world with me. It sounds like you are an amazing mom. I’m so glad you could relate, and sense the importance of this calling to raise up these little people. May God strengthen your heart as you continue to uncover the weight of this calling! He truly is enough. And it’s something I need to be reminded of constantly. Thanks for taking the time to share your beautiful perspective.
      Rebekah

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