Amanda’s Testimony

In 2014, we decided it was time to grow our family. My husband and I knew that there could be roadblocks because I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome). We set out with our trust in God that it would happen, but then my cycle stopped altogether. We were referred to an endocrinologist who specializes in infertility.

As I sat in the room for tests to be conducted on my womb, I repeated my mantra of “Be still and know,” one thousand times. I kept telling myself that the tests would come back clear. However, the doctor reported that polyps and a misshaped uterus were preventing me from being able to conceive. Still, I told myself, “Be still and know.”

That following Sunday at church, our pastor gave a sermon where he spoke about the lessons God was teaching us in our current season, whatever that may be. My husband and I knew that in our current situation of infertility, the Lord had something further that we needed to learn. This lesson was surrender. We needed to turn all of ourselves over to him and to trust in His steadfast love. We took steps to eat better, to be more active, to love each other more, and most of all, to spend more time with Him.

On November 11, 2014, I underwent surgery to make my womb a place in which a baby could grow. Over the next few months, we continued waiting for the next step in our treatment. Finally, the time had come to try to conceive. Again in church, the sermon spoke to our hearts. Our pastor spoke of miracles on the horizon because nothing is impossible for the Lord. Our miracle was in the making. Luke 1:45 says, “Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her.”

Exactly one year to the day of my surgery, we welcomed our incredible little Jonah into the world. We called him our wink from God because every time we saw 11:11 on a clock, my husband and I would pray for a baby and here he was on 11/11/15.

God decided that we should be blessed again with another child. In February of this year, we discovered that without any medical intervention, I had conceived again. The first few weeks of the pregnancy, we faced concerns that the baby might not be growing. Again, I turned to the word of the Lord and was reminded of the following: Hebrews 11:1-2 “To have faith is to be sure of the things we hope for, to be certain of the things we cannot see.” It was time to, “Be still and know.”

My pregnancy continued to progress with minor bumps along the way until August 20th at 1:50 am, when I woke up to my water unexpectedly breaking. I immediately woke my husband up to rush me to the hospital. This was the longest 15 minute drive of our lives. As I shook and poked my belly, praying and begging for movement, some kind of response. I was getting none.

I look back at that drive now and realize there was a great presence of peace that I wasn’t able to grasp then, but now see that God was with us every moment of the way. As soon as we got to the hospital, I was hooked to the heart monitor and we heard Samuel’s heartbeat. Greg and I immediately said prayers of gratitude because we thought we’d lost our son before we had a chance to hold him.

Because I was only 32 weeks along, we were told that I had to stay in the hospital for two weeks to give the baby more time to grow. This hit us hard because we have our first to care for. I felt deep grief as I missed him so much, even with his twice daily visits. But again God showed us great support through our family and friends during this time.

Midway through my first week stay in the hospital, I started bleeding heavily. My placenta had an abruption and kicked me into labor at 33 weeks. After hours of labor, Samuel entered the world with a magnificent cry. This cry was the most beautiful sound. It overcame our fear that he would need assistance breathing. Again we praised God.

He truly makes all things possible.

Samuel had to stay in the NICU for 13 days; during which God showed us growth daily. Samuel is now a month old and is progressing normally.

Through our two beautiful boys, our family has truly learned of God’s faithfulness. His love abounds!

–Amanda

Amanda, Thank you so much for sharing your story with us! Isn’t it incredible how God is always with us, giving us peace through the trials and celebrating with us in our times of JOY? Having such a sense of TRUST IN GOD, in such a huge part of dealing with infertility, and we couldn’t be more happy for you and your husband, and now your growing family!! Thanks again for sharing your beautiful testimony with us!

 

Ruth’s Testimony

 

I married my high school sweetheart and while getting married at age 19 certainly would pose its share of challenges, I was no stranger to the valleys and desert places we can find ourselves in when God’s plan doesn’t seem to fit with the expectations we set in our hearts. My mom went to be with Jesus when I was 15, and through that loss God revealed his unconditional and unwavering love for me when I met the man who would be my future spouse that same year.

Fast forward 3 years after our wedding and with the same feelings I had when the Lord told me who I would marry, I had a dream I was pregnant and that my husband and I needed to stop using birth control and begin on our journey to start a family. I was 22, my husband 23, both of us pretty fresh out of university and trying to navigate our career paths and definitely not in the world’s eyes “ready” for kids; however, I did not question God’s voice and neither did my husband since we had seen his goodness when we stepped out in faith.

That dream of being pregnant was in December of 2012, and I still remember at Christmas in my stocking my husband gave me a gift certificate for a maternity clothing store and I couldn’t have been more thrilled! While it was just a little folded up piece of paper, for me, it was a gesture that meant my husband trusted in what God had said to me and that he was ready for this new season.

I describe that first year of “trying” as having emotional bumps. Not necessarily roller coaster type feelings, but just that hopefulness that the next month would be the month. A year and a half after trying for a baby, the focus on having a family actually began to get fuzzy, as we were facing totally unrelated health complications for my husband. By the summer of 2015, he was at the point where working even part-time was almost unbearable due to the pain in his knees. He had started his own company the previous year and God knew he would need the flexibility to be able to take off as much time as he would need to get a diagnosis and hopefully find healing.

As Psalm 136 says, “His faithful love endures forever” and by the spring of 2016 my husband was back working full-time. Through those couple years, I remember holding on to the scripture in Ecclesiastes 3 that says there is a season and a time for every purpose under heaven, and through many tears shed over the pages of my journal, I knew this season would end and a new one would begin, one that would include a baby.

At the end of 2015, we had already decided that since it had been 3 years of trying to conceive without any success it would be wise to begin looking into why we hadn’t got pregnant. So throughout 2016, we went for numerous tests and were eventually put on a path that would lead to IVF.

As I write this I am days away from finding out if we are pregnant through the IVF journey we have been on. Yet, while we have expectant hearts for a new life to come into our home, I have discovered in the past 5 years that God’s plan is not for my story to end with saying that “God has blessed us with a child (whether it be through IVF or not) and that God can do it for you too.”

Instead, my story is one that speaks to what you learn and how you grow in the waiting.

My story is one that speaks to what you learn and how you grow in the waiting.

We live in a culture where waiting is not valued, time is of the essence and “wait times” create frustration and angst. For me, it has been in the waiting where Jesus has spoken to me and told me I am his beloved, that his timing is perfect. There is a song by Bethel Music, called “Take Courage” and I have soaked in God’s presence as I have listened to it many times, maybe you have, too. It goes,

“Slow down take time
Breathe in He said
He’ll reveal what’s to come
The thoughts in His mind
Always higher than mine
And He’ll reveal all to come

Take courage my heart, stay steadfast my soul
He’s in the waiting, he’s in the waiting
Hold onto your hope, as your triumph unfolds
He’s never failing, He’s never failing

You who hold the stars
Who call them each by name
Will surely keep Your promise to me
That I will rise in Your victory”

It’s easy to be discontent in the waiting and to feel that you will only be able to say, “He is good,” when the victory comes. However, I believe what you do and how you respond in the waiting can actually be just as powerful of a testimony as when you tell others about the miracle you received.

I was recently listening to a sermon where the pastor was speaking on David’s victory over Goliath and the preacher said, “When bravery and faithfulness meet, miracles are often the result.” Bravery and faithfulness are choices I must make every day so I am not shaken by the waves of doubt, grief, and the longing desires of my flesh.

Daily, God meets me in the waiting and I know I will be waiting on a countless number of things for the rest of my life, so I will find true rest and joy as He weaves together testimony after testimony of his goodness and faithfulness in my waiting so I can encourage others in theirs.

-Ruth

UPDATE: Praise the Lord! Ruth sent this testimony several months ago, and since then, Ruth has become pregnant, she recently confirmed she is now 11.5 weeks pregnant. It is amazing how God truly works in the “waiting periods” of our lives.


Amen Ruth! Thank you for sharing your testimony on how to wait, in the hard times and in the most gracious way. When God doesn’t answer our prayers as soon as we hope, it doesn’t mean He still isn’t there for us, it doesn’t mean He is choosing to ignore us, but like you said, it becomes a time to find true rest and joy as He weaves together testimony after testimony of his goodness and faithfulness. And now, Congratulations on this little blessing you’ve been praying for!

If you would like to share your testimony of how God has healed your womb, or how He has healed, or is healing your soul (whether or not you have a baby) please email me at [email protected] and check out the writer’s guidelines at “Want To Share Your Testimony?” You can also subscribe with your email address, or follow along on my Facebook Page.

 

Connie’s Testimony

This is a real picture of our friend Connie. Isn’t she beautiful–inside and out? 🙂

 

For the past two years, I have been on a new type of rollercoaster ride with so many moving parts and this has definitely challenged me in my faith. I felt like if I’m special to God, why haven’t I been blessed with children?

For a while, I didn’t plan to share this until I have reached success, but I feel like I’m finding more of us who are in a similar situation. We get married later in life, work on our careers, get to know ourselves better inside out, and then when we finally think, now is a good time to bring children into the world, we find it’s not as easy to conceive as we could have as teenagers. When people would scare and warn you that you can get pregnant at a drop of a hat.

Recently, I saw a friend’s sister on Instagram share her IVF journey and this inspired me. I’m sure my story will encourage someone out there, struggling between trusting God and “infertility.”

Although it hasn’t been easy, it has challenged my faith and trust in God. I have to say though, in each of our stressful situations, God is trying to show Him who He is to you. It’s all about His relationship to you. It’s trying to show Him a deeper part of how He loves you.

In my quiet times, I know there is a purpose for this waiting period until I am able to conceive. People have prayed for me and I have several confirmations that I will have biological children. Some days, I’m confident and hopeful, while some days, I’m focused on how my period cycles have been increasing in length, then how could I get pregnant? If I can’t even find the right window?

You see, God gave me seeds of hope and expectation. My job is to stay faithful and patient. My action? To rest, worship, and rejoice for how God will work behind the scenes in His appointed time.

I’m starting to realize that the enemy loves to rob me of my hope. He likes to come in and just mess with my patience.

How does he do that? Well, he works in the natural-what we can see, while God works in the supernatural- the unseen.

So for a good six months in 2016, I let anxiety push me. I let voices from my family, peers, society tell me I’m getting old beyond my fertility age. They summarized, “It will be too late.” Now!!!!

I rushed into seeing fertility specialists, going to see acupuncturists, and doing whatever I can so that I can be as “fertile” as possible. Let me say, I had no peace. My mind was spinning and there was no joy. I felt like this was a performance show, meeting everybody’s expectations to prove that I can be fruitful by own might. Basically what I put in, I will reap.

Most recently, IVF was popping up around me in different avenues. I was curious but completely uncomfortable to my core about the process. I just knew that I physically didn’t feel good after trying several IUI’s and didn’t want to go through another intense process. I know God can work through doctors, but for us, He was clearly showing us not to go this route.

Recently, I read a book and it mentioned about how Sarah (Abraham’s wife in the Bible) took control of the situation when she and Abraham were promised a child and they didn’t conceive. She lost patience and a child was born out of their own will, not God’s plan. This decision affected the generations after.

You see, this was what I was doing. Knowing God’s promise personally for my situtation, yet I tried to conceive by my own control. I would surrender and then I take back my anxiety. I surrender and I take back again…and again…

Well today, I know that my blessing will come. It’s only a matter of time. I have to guard my heart to hold onto God’s promises and not waiver. I have to be deliberate about surrendering my anxious thoughts daily.

I appreciate any prayers and support. Thanks for all who have already been my cheerleaders. 

To be continued…

–Connie

Photo credit: Liz Franco Photography


Connie, I’m in tears as I read your journey through the past few years, your battle between desiring God’s work in your life and also wanting your desires to be met in some sort of time frame that is close. Thank you so much for sharing, as many women are currently in this place, and not many are as courageous, to share their raw emotions and bare their hearts. It is obvious how God is working in you. We’re cheering for you, and praying for you!

If you would like to share your testimony of how God has healed your womb, or how He has healed, or is healing your soul (whether or not you have a baby) please email me at [email protected] and check out the writer’s guidelines at “Want To Share Your Testimony?” I feature a Testimony each Tuesday, you can also subscribe with your email address, or follow along on my Facebook Page.

Danielle’s Testimony

 

My husband and I had gotten married in 2012 and had always been open to starting a family from the beginning. Naturally, I thought this was going to just happen because I came from a family that could easily get pregnant. My internal struggle began after months of feeling disappointed. My heart longed to be a mom. My heart longed to have a family.

We decided to get some things tested to see if we needed help. Through this testing we decided to stay a more natural route with no interventions. After one of my many appointments, I heard God speak to me. I was in tears walking out of the doctor’s office and I heard loud and clearly, “Trust me.” My tears stopped flowing and I knew that I needed to turn over all of my pain, discouragement and anger to God and exchange it for hope.

We continued to live our married life which came with its ups and downs. My husband had changed jobs a couple of times and even went a period of time without a job. We continued to live in our apartment and dreamed about starting a family and owning a home. I remember one night I was just crying. The kind of crying where you can’t catch your breath. My heart was just hurting for all the things that my heart desired. Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. I got on my knees and raised my hands and just told God to take all of the pain. Well, He answered by stopping my tears. I again heard him say, “Trust me.”

My prayers changed from asking Him for what I wanted—to praising Him and telling Him, “Thy Will Be Done!” I let go of control and decided to start living and serving Him in the moment.

After another year of being open to whatever God had planned, my husband got a new job that provided enough income to buy a home in Oct. 2016. I had been struggling with my job for about 2 years, feeling like God wanted me somewhere else. March 1, 2017, I put in my resignation and decided to follow God as he led me to a new career.

April 4th 2017 God answered yet another prayer. I had gotten my very first positive pregnancy test! I couldn’t believe my eyes. God had answered all of our prayers. We are due in December 2017 and can’t believe God chose us to be parents to this peanut. His timing and plan was more perfect than anything I could have dreamed up. Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him and he will make your paths straight.”

My prayer for anyone reading this is to sit in God’s presence. He hears you. He wants to hold you through this struggle. When you hurt, he hurts with you. May you feel his extreme love for you as he unveils your amazing story.

–Danielle

 

Danielle is due this December 2017.


Wow, Danielle! Thank you so much for sharing you testimony. It’s so encouraging to read stories not only that we can relate to, in our struggles, but also rejoice with, in the end, as God is answering every prayer!! I love how you made a point to say that when we hurt, God hurts with us. That is so true, and in so many areas of our lives. What an exciting time for you and your husband!! Thank you again for sharing with us.

If you would like to share your testimony of how God has healed your womb, or how He has healed, or is healing your soul (whether or not you have a baby) please email me at [email protected] and check out the writer’s guidelines at “Want To Share Your Testimony?” I feature a Testimony each Tuesday, you can also subscribe with your email address, or follow along on my Facebook Page.

Love, Rebekah

 

The Sacred Art of Remembering

Can I be honest? I’ve had a hard time engaging with God lately. Maybe it’s because I’m 3 weeks post-partum and I’m a little thrown off my rocker. Or, maybe it’s because it’s the dead of winter.  Either way, I finally made some time–just to meet with Him.

My husband and daughter were out at a basketball game. And my newborn son had just fallen asleep.

I brewed some coffee, and opened my Bible and journal. I was trying. But…the words in my Bible just seemed to blur. And I stared instead at my blank journal.

And felt…just that.

Blank.

My mind was tired from the day, and I had nothing.

I looked down at my newborn son sleeping in my lap. I studied his face. When so subtly, I heard the Lord say…

“Remember when I healed his brain?”

My heart wrenched. (To read that story click here.)

Tears filled my eyes.

I remembered.

And my spirit, which has felt asleep the last few weeks…suddenly awakened.

I wasn’t prepared for what came next.

“Let’s play a game,” I felt God say, “It’s called…’Remember when I…”

My heart burned. And my hands trembled.

And I opened my journal, and began..

“Remember when I heard your cry to get pregnant?”

“Remember the day you found out you were pregnant in the upstairs bathroom, and fell on your knees by the sink?”

“Remember when I provided for you and your husband?”

“Remember when I showed you which house to rent?”

“Rembember when I provided the house you have now?”

“Remember when I…”

(I know these examples may seem flat as you read this…but to me, they are deeply meaningful experiences I had with God. And there are more. More than I could share. And some, too personal to share.)

But what I want to say is…I began to remember.

All of these specific moments where He came through. 

Where He showed Himself faithful.

Where He showed Himself kind.

Where He showed Himself.

Close. To me.

Presently involved in situations I didn’t know He cared about.

But He did.

And He does.

And He’s close. Closer than any of us dare to believe.

And as I wrote in my journal, as I took time to simply “remember,” a song called “Take A Moment” by Will Reagan came on. And no joke, the words were, “Take a moment to remember, who God is, and who I am…”

“Take a moment…to remember.”

I was pierced to the heart. God came through to me. Even in spite of my sleep deprivation. Even in spite of my many unspiritual thoughts lately. Even in spite of my lack of effort to draw near to Him.

He was simply inviting me…through some mysterious invitation from His Spirit, to “remember.”

Remember. 

We always want God to speak something new to us. We always want God to do something. To change something. And we should–after all, He is God. He invites His children to ask Him, to call upon Him day and night.

But there is something so sacred and so holy about just pausing to remember what He has already done. 

The more we remember, the more we can trust Him. The more we can rest in Him. The more we know how very near He is.

David wrote, “I shall remember the deeds of the LORD;
Surely I will remember Your wonders of old.

I will meditate on all Your work
And muse on Your deeds.” Psalm 77: 11-12

Maybe you too have had a hard time engaging with Him lately. Maybe you aren’t sure what to read, or write, or do. And it’s okay.

Because maybe you just need to look behind you for a moment. Take a breath and see how far He has taken you. Where the road has curved and bent. Where it was dark and scary. And where He brought you through the pass. Where He met you and showed you how to walk.

Maybe you just need to sit a rock, and remember. That time. And that time. And that time.

Because He is so faithful. And the things He does…are worth remembering. This is the sacred art of remembering.

And maybe He’s whispering to your spirit tonight. Maybe He’s inviting you to play a holy game called,

“Remember when I…”

Remember.