After a very long and intense 30-hour labor–our baby boy arrived on December 14th at 10:39 p.m.
We named him Jesse Michael. Jesse which means “gift.” And we are so in love.
I never knew a boy could be so beautiful, but he is.
Oh, it was the hardest day of my life. Laboring with him. Everyone told me their second labor was faster and easier…but mine was longer…and so much harder. But the Lord was with me, and my husband, Brandon. Who again proved himself to be like an angel without wings. Soothing me with his gentle voice, and persistent spirit, he did not leave my side.
By the end, I literally felt like I was at the end of myself. Like I had nothing left. I felt like he would never come. Like I could never cross that finish line. Like he was still a million miles away. So far out of reach.
But he was right there, the whole time. Just waiting for the right moment.
And I listened to that song, “Out of Hiding” by Steffany Gretzinger, and I wept in between contractions.
“Baby, you’re almost home now,
Please don’t quit now,
Baby, you’re almost home now,
And finally, he came. By some miracle, God opened the way. And delivered him. And me.
And when he finally came out, (facing up, so that our spines were against each other the whole time)…he was a whopping 9 lbs. 11 oz.! (Almost 3 pounds heavier than his big sister!)
And they threw him on my chest, and he wailed, and my husband and I, cried happy tears. And my fragile arms shook with this miracle, I couldn’t believe I was at last holding in my arms.
Sometimes, even when I am so beyond tired…I can’t close my eyes. I lay on the bed and just stare at him. The wonder of him.
The wonder that he is here.
How did he come to us?
How did God form this masterpiece?
This masterpiece we had no idea would be coming to us at this time last year.
But he came.
Not because we did anything to deserve him. Not because we proved our faith to God.
But because of God.
God gives good and perfect gifts.
He came like a gift. Undeserved. Unearned.
But gladly received with great joy.
Received with open arms. And hot and happy tears. And hearts exploding with joy. Our arms and our hearts stretch to wrap around you.
Welcome to the world, Jesse. You are a perfect gift.
And we thank God for giving you to us.
For you are from Him.
“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” James 1:17
For more on the story behind our second miracle, Jesse, read these posts: